The question of when should parents make wills usually arrives after a milestone: a positive pregnancy test, a house move, a wedding or the birth of a second child. But the most useful answer is simpler: make a will as soon as someone depends on you. A will is not a document for later life. For parents, it is a practical way to record who should look after the children, who should manage money for them and who should receive what you leave behind.
Without one, the law decides who inherits under the intestacy rules. Those rules cannot reflect the people you trust, the family arrangements you have made or the future you want for your children.
When should parents make wills? The key moments
The best time to make a will is before an emergency makes decisions harder. If you are expecting a child, have recently become a parent or have children who rely on you financially, it is sensible to put one in place now.
That applies whether you are married, in a civil partnership, living together or raising a child on your own. It also applies if you feel you have very little to leave. A family home, savings, life insurance, a death-in-service benefit and personal possessions can all matter. More importantly, your will can name guardians and set out how money should be looked after for a child who is too young to manage an inheritance.
There are several points when making or reviewing a will should move to the top of the list:
- You are expecting or have had a baby.
- You have become a homeowner or taken on a larger mortgage.
- You move in with a partner or marry.
- You separate, divorce or enter a new relationship.
- You have another child, including a stepchild or adopted child.
- Your chosen executor, guardian or beneficiary dies or becomes unsuitable.
- Your finances change through an inheritance, business interest, pension or life insurance policy.
A will is not a prediction that something bad will happen. It is a sensible instruction sheet for the people you love if life does not go to plan.
Why a will matters more once you have children
For most parents, the central question is not who gets the furniture or savings. It is who would care for the children if both parents died before they were adults.
A will allows you to appoint guardians. This is the person, or people, you would want to take responsibility for your children if there is no surviving parent with parental responsibility who can care for them. Your choice is highly influential, although the court’s overriding concern will always be the child’s welfare if there is a dispute.
Choosing a guardian can feel uncomfortable, but postponing it does not make the decision disappear. Think about the person’s relationship with your child, their health, stability, location and willingness to take on the role. Speak to them first. A loving grandparent may be the right person, but so may a sibling, close friend or another relative with a similar approach to family life.
It is also wise to name substitute guardians. Circumstances can change over the years, and a backup choice gives your family more guidance if your first choice cannot act.
Guardians and money do not have to be the same job
The person best placed to raise your child is not always the person best placed to manage an inheritance. Your will can appoint executors and trustees to deal with the estate, pay debts and hold money for children. You can choose the same people for every role, but you do not have to.
This distinction can make a difficult choice easier. For example, a sister might be a natural guardian because she is close to the children, while a financially confident friend or relative could help manage funds as a trustee. The right arrangement depends on your family, not a one-size-fits-all rule.
Do married parents still need a will?
Yes. Marriage does not replace a will. If you die without one, the intestacy rules decide how your estate is shared. A surviving spouse or civil partner has certain rights, but this does not mean your estate will be distributed exactly as you would have chosen, particularly where children are involved.
A will can also make practical arrangements clearer. You can choose executors, name guardians, deal with personal possessions and decide at what age children should receive their inheritance. Many parents prefer children not to receive a large sum outright at 18, when they may still be studying, renting or finding their feet. A will can use trusts to hold funds until an age you choose, while allowing trustees to spend money for the child’s benefit beforehand.
For unmarried couples, the need is often even more urgent. Living together does not give partners the same automatic inheritance rights as marriage or civil partnership. If you want your partner to inherit, or to be able to remain in the family home, you need to make proper provision in a will.
What if you own a home together?
How you own your property affects what happens on death. Couples may own a home as joint tenants or as tenants in common, and the difference can be significant.
Joint tenants usually own the property together in a way that means the surviving owner automatically receives the other person’s share. Tenants in common each own a defined share, which can pass under their will. This can be relevant for parents who want to protect a share of the home for their children while still allowing a surviving partner to live there.
Protective Property Trusts and Flexible Life Interest Trusts can sometimes help where there are children from previous relationships, concerns about remarriage, or a wish to balance a surviving partner’s security with children’s future inheritance. These arrangements need careful consideration because they are not right for every household. The ownership of the home, the size of the estate and family circumstances all matter.
Make a will before, and after, major changes
A will should not be filed away and forgotten. Review it after a major life event and every few years even if nothing obvious has changed.
Marriage usually revokes an existing will unless it was made in contemplation of that marriage. Divorce does not automatically cancel a will, though provisions involving a former spouse may be treated differently. This is why it is important to review your document promptly rather than assume it still says what you intend.
The arrival of a child does not invalidate a will, but an old will may not include that child, name suitable guardians or reflect your new priorities. A new home can raise similar issues, especially if you have changed from renting to owning or bought with a new partner.
Remember that some assets sit outside a will. Pension death benefits and many life insurance policies may depend on separate nominations or instructions. Check those arrangements alongside your will so that your overall plan is consistent.
What parents should decide before writing a will
You do not need to have every detail of your finances memorised before starting. However, a little preparation makes the process much easier. Think about who you trust to act as executor, who you would choose as guardians, and who should inherit if your first-choice beneficiaries die before you.
You should also consider whether a particular gift is important. It might be a sentimental item, money set aside for education or a contribution towards a child’s first home. Clear wishes reduce the risk of confusion and disagreement later.
Be realistic about your choices. Naming someone does not oblige them to take on a role they cannot manage, which is why having a conversation matters. It is better to have an honest discussion now than leave loved ones facing uncertainty at an already distressing time.
Making sure your will is valid
A carefully written will still needs to be signed correctly. In England and Wales, you must sign it in the presence of two witnesses, who must both be present at the same time. They then sign in your presence.
Witnesses should be independent adults. A beneficiary, or the husband, wife or civil partner of a beneficiary, should not witness the will because this can affect their gift. Store the signed original somewhere safe and make sure your executors know where it is. A scanned copy is useful for reference, but it does not replace the original signed will.
English Wills is designed to make these decisions feel more manageable, with plain-English guidance for parents who want to put a legally valid will in place without unnecessary complexity.
Making a will will not remove every uncertainty from family life. It can, however, give the people closest to you clear direction when they most need it. If your children rely on you today, that is reason enough to start.